She won’t come to Playgroup because she thinks all the moms there have everything together. I keep trying to tell her that NOONE has it all together-that’s the beauty of hanging out with other moms! I’m pretty passionate on this issue; look at this little “online playgroup” we’ve started right here. I know there are some amazing moms out there who think of every detail, sew their own costumes, bake their own cakes, create their own crafts, and read every parenting book. I salute you. We all salute you. And, I think we all strive for perfection, but sometimes our own perfection is a little imperfect. I’m getting comfortable being ok with that, and I hope we all find that comfortable place in imperfection.
However, my friend still insists these moms show up with perfectly packed lunches, including individual containers of peas and carrots and organic homemade brownies. When, in reality, some slap a PB&J together while loading the car, some grab random pantry items walking out the door, and others stop at McDonald’s on the way. Her next argument is that her 2 year old is “the worst toddler in the history of toddlers,” and she will be embarrassed and stressed out the entire playtime. After matching her story-for-story with something from the antics of my own 3 year old, I explain that ANOTHER bonus of playgroup is SEEING that your own children just aren’t that bad. They are NORMAL, and you are normal for thinking they are so crazy. All kids are crazy. It’s some kind of rule. I also plug the other moms by passing along the wisdom I’ve learned from many years of hanging with some smart gals. It’s WONDERFUL to find simple answers to difficult problems, and sometimes just a new perspective makes that possible. Playgroup makes that possible.
But still, she hasn’t fallen to my peer pressure; however, I have faith I’ll win one of these days. One of these days her little guy will do something so outrageous she’ll seek out some validation of her own sanity. And, I promise I won’t say “I told you so.” I’ll be too busy eating my perfectly cut celery and hummus.